‘Am racked by torture and loss! But am making plan with Scarlet to deal with post-break-up trauma. Must channel anger into something positive, so have new mission statement:
Not to moon about over exes but to embrace single life.
To stay away from all men (Sad Ed excepted as he is not actual man).
To remain true to our friends, forsaking all others.
Scarlet is right. Life will be so much easier without the complications of love. It will be utter Simple Life and am completely committed. Starting tomorrow…’